Okay, fine. It’s not that cool. HD programming is exactly the same as non-HD with the obvious exception that you can now see much more of the Divas then once legally allowed and I’m fairly certain that the “Ric Flair” we’ve all known and loved for the past five years is actually just spray-tanned chicken skin thrown on a mannequin.

The clarity of HD programming, while awesome, is quite unforgiving, especially in a profession where the wardrobe is generally somewhere between softcore porn and figure skating: spandex, and not much of it.

In the end, WWE’s move to HD was a smart move and yet another way the company allows fans greater access—for better or worse—to their talent. The only other drawback I can see with the HD programming at this stage of the game comes with the new sets that were constructed for the move and the bevy of epileptic seizures it will induce. The glowing, bastardized version of Freemont Street does provide something of a 3D effect and seems cool the first few times; after that, it kind of makes Cloverfield seem like steady camerawork.

The Week In Televised Wrestling:

Smackdown (1/18)
Ric Flair and MVP’s upcoming match at the Royal Rumble may only hold as much intrigue as the “Nature Boy’s” retirement situation does. A rather innocuous match with only enough buildup to whet the fans’ collective appetite, the potential that it could be Flair’s last match—retired by a man in a bodysuit—is really the only interesting factor, which is a shame. If Flair had remained part of the Smackdown brand, post-draft, and was able to run a program such as this with MVP for a bit longer, it could have only paid off huge dividends for the “highest paid superstar in Smackdown history.” For now, we can only wonder what would have been and look forward to yet another convoluted Flair victory on Sunday.

Raw (1/21)
The rumors circulating the Internet appear to be true, assuming that the tremendous amount of thinly veiled innuendo on Raw is any indicator. There is a very high likelihood that once again, in conjunction with WrestleMania, there will be yet another WWE Diva gracing the pages of Playboy magazine and that would be the blissfully unaware Maria Kanellis. Following in the footsteps of greats such as Sable (no longer with WWE), Torrie Wilson (on the shelf with a nasty back injury), Candice Michelle (ditto, collarbone), Christy Hemme (now in TNA), and, of course, Chyna (too easy). Come to think of it, the only Diva that still cashes a regular WWE check is Ashley Massaro, and she was in hot water with the company a while back. Here’s hoping Maria fares better than her predecessors.

ECW (1/22)
You know what they say: 20th time’s a charm! Sure, it’s only been four shots at C.M. Punk over the past month, but finally—finally—Chavo Guerrero Jr. fans everywhere can rejoice, for their idol has climbed the mountain! Well, ECW’s not really a “mountain” per se. More like a small hill or knoll. Actually, ECW kind of reminds us of one of those piles of backfill you’d find near a construction area. You know, the one that you and your buddies would climb as kids and play “King Of The Mountain”? Yeah, one of those. Chavo Guerrero Jr. is king of the dirt hill, and C.M. Punk is finally liberated from those 10 pounds of fool’s gold that was weighing him down.

Impact (1/24)
Hopefully our fellow fans were cognizant enough to realize how fortunate they were last night to catch a match involving both the legendary Tiger Mask and the curiously familiar Curry Man on Impact. Both are legends of Japanese wrestling and worthy of as much face time—so to speak—as possible on any wrestling program. While their tag match with Jimmy Rave and Lance Hoyt surely did not do their collective skills justice, it still was quite a scene and worthy of being checked out if you missed it.

And Finally … This weekend’s Royal Rumble pay-per-view is one of WWE’s most time honored and enjoyable cards. Throughout the 20-year history of the event, there have been plenty of memorable moments, although one is overlooked—and for good reason. At the first Royal Rumble held at the world famous Copps Coliseum in Hamilton, Ontario, the Jumping Bomb Angels defeated The Glamour Girls to win the WWF women’s tag team championship in, get this, a two-out-of-three falls match. It signaled the only time a women’s tag team championship match was held during one of the company’s staple events. The title was retired in 1989.